Shabbat Shalom

A slightly different take from my normal short message and image, this week.

Having read Lamentations and other writings at our Erev Tishah B’v service this week, I am in a reflective mood (more so than usual, I should probably add).  Meandering in, around and over the J-Blogosphere today, I revisited Jew Wishes’ blog and clicked on an intriguing website link – Eye Contact Foundation.  It turned out to be the website concerned with the book ‘Besa: Muslims Who Saved Jews in World War II’ which she reviewed here a little while ago.

I have been looking at all the entries on the website, for all of the different people that followed the Albanian tradition of besa (see here for an in-depth article on the meaning of the word) and cannot choose between them.  But here is a typical example of what besa meant to the Albanians in World War Two.

Shabbat Shalom.

Kinah – Ze’ev Falk

How shall we lament the Temple,

How bewail the trees and stones,

Our ears tingling from a new cry;

the voice of myriads of burnt ones.

The destruction of a third of our people

Matches the loss of its two sanctuaries,

And what will the tabernacle of our God give

When there is no longer the people to enter its gates?

How shall we recount the pogroms of the enemy,

How shall we describe the terrors of war,

Has not the destruction within the heart come first,

Eaten from within the flesh of our nation?

The destruction going on now matches

All the falls of the past.

How then do we hope for a New House

For the people of the Lord, before it has returned?

This night we weep for the House of Israel

Over the ruin of the people in spirit and body.

Over the hiding God, a world that suffers,

And everyone who goes hence without returning.

['Tishah B'Av' by Maurice Minkowski (1881-1930), Watercolour 1927].

This seemed appropriate

“There is only one thing worse than Auschwitz itself…

… and that is if the world forgets there was such a place.”

Henry Appel, Auschwitz survivor

I’ve just finished reading Primo Levi’s ‘If This is a Man’ closely followed by ‘The Truce’.  I was going to review them, but I can’t even begin to find the words to do them both justice.  All I will say is that both books are written in a style that I have never found in books written by other survivors of the Shoah (and I have read many).  I’m sure most of you will have read these books, but if not, I recommend them.  What a great, great writer.

Too much choice

I’m not complaining, really, I’m not.

But sometimes, don’t you think we have too much choice in our lives?

What am I referring to, specifically? Well, it’s the number and variety of tallitot that are available out there.  I have decided that I will wear a tallit and kippah once I have converted – it just feels right for me.  (Part of me just wants to turn up at shul the first Shabbat after I have converted and calmly put my tallit on, but I will have to tell somebody my exciting news beforehand, otherwise I will burst!  I think I know who I will tell too, as long as he can keep quiet about it, which I am sure he will).

Anyway, I could go ‘traditional’, white with blue, black, silver or gold stripes (or a mixture of these colours), or I could go distinctive and choose something that has none of the ‘traditional’ aspects about it, other than the tzitzit.  Of course, the tallit we know today isn’t something that has been handed down from time immemorial, since the important point were the tzitzit themselves – until not so long ago in the grand scheme of things, all clothing was four cornered, so tzitzit were placed on all clothes.  The blessing isn’t to do with being commanded to wear a tallit, but to wear tzitzit!  So, other than the tzitzit, I don’t feel compelled to go for the norm.  I take my lead from the other women at my shul who also wear a tallit – there are some beautiful designs out there!

Which is all part of the problem.  I have fallen in love with the tallitot designed by Yair Emanuel in Israel, who makes a point of employing new immigrants to Israel and disabled people, as well as donating a portion of his profits to charity (all good things, don’t you think?).  They are expensive, but I’m not planning on buying many of these, just the one (for now)!  If any of you care to take a look at his designs, you will see how lovely they are.

Ah, decisions, decisions… these are my current favourites… enjoy!

The Matriarchs – has the names of the four matriarchs on each corner

Papercut – this remins me of stained glass

Tree of Life – beautiful Etz Chaim!

Miriam & the Drum – I love the waves, being by the seaside, this one seems appropriate (as well as the ‘proper’ story attached to it, of course!

The Matriarchs 2 – very delicate!

Birds & Pomegranates - whimsical!

More Pomegranates – juicy!

Progress, progress

After all the excitement following my meeting with the Rabbi, it dawned on me that I would really have to get a move on to get my two essays ready for the start of September, since we are away for 2 weeks next month (can’t wait for that!).

I’ve already written several drafts of my first essay – ‘What Being Jewish Means To Me’.  I didn’t even look at them yesterday because I knew that the first one was too long and was too much of a brain-dump to re-draft, whereas the second one just didn’t work.  So, I sat in front of my Mac and let the words flow.  I have never been one for planning essays – ever since we were taught at school that we should draft out an introduction, body and conclusion before writing the real thing, I just haven’t done it.  I expect I am lucky in that I can keep the substance in my mind’s eye to rely on, rather than having to write it down.  Anyway, I just resorted to a brief drawn mindmap and launched into it.  Four hours later, after much use of the backspace and delete buttons on my keyboard, plus several cups of decaffeinated coffee and a toasted teacake, I tapped out the last words.

It’s not a long essay, but it says what being Jewish means to me.  It isn’t a self-edited version of me and it feels real.

Hopefully, the next essay will be less difficult, because it’s not about me.  I can choose from The Jewish Lifecycle or The Jewish Festivals, within the context of Liberal Judaism - I think the hardest part will be choosing between them rather than writing about them!

Something unexpected

Well.  I am sitting here on the sofa, with a huge smile on my face and joy in my heart.  I have been itching to write this ever since I got home from shul yesterday, and now it’s Sunday and I can unleash myself on the computer at last!

So, I had my after Kiddush meeting with the rabbi yesterday, to ask all those questions that I had running around inside my head. It was great to have some dedicated time, focus and clarity before she took some time away from the shul.  (The service that day was her last Shabbat service before study leave and a holiday before the onslaught of the High Holy Days and it was beautiful.  She chose a service we don’t normally follow (we have 5 to choose from) and you could just tell she was really enjoying herself).

But the very, very best bit of our discussion was when she asked me a question – ‘Would you like to convert at Chanukah?’

I honestly never expected that to happen!  I thought it would be next year before I got to that stage.

Needless to say, of course I said ‘yes’! What a perfect time to do it, at a time of celebration!

And now for the hard work – I need to get my two essays finalised by the start of September for the rabbi to review and then submitted in time for the next meeting of the Rabbinic Board.

Plus I need to get a tallit.  Not that I haven’t been investigating this one for a while…. so many to choose from!

Woohoo!

Not forgotten

I recently received a form from my shul, asking for the dates of loved ones yahrzeits, so that the could be announced in the service on the nearest Shabbat.  It did throw me a bit, because it made me realise that the actual specific anniversary dates of my grandparents’ deaths weren’t fixed in my mind.  Not because I had forgotten about any of them – indeed, I am always conscious of the time of year when they died, but not the specific date.

I distinctly remember during the year following my maternal grandmother’s death that I opened my PDA one morning to see a little reminder pop up for ‘Grandma’s birthday in 7 days’.  I felt sick – she had died 10 months ago, but of course my little electronic diary didn’t know this.  It was horrible – just before her birthday she had started to become unwell and then 2 months later, she was gone.  It struck me that I missed her terribly every day, I could tell you the anniversary of her funeral, but not the actual day she died, as if my mind had blocked it out.  And as I thought on this a bit more, I realised that I had unconsciously done the same thing for my grandfather.  My other grandmother was a different matter – I hadn’t found out about her death for a long while (complicated story) and I had never met her husband as they had divorced many years before I was born.

Why am I writing about this?  Well, I saw this post on the Not Just Typical blog and it made me think.  Not having any real experience of any other religions, I’m not certain if they make such a point of remembering people – whether it is specific loved ones, all of the global community from times past or any peoples that have suffered (which is what my shul does on Tishah B’Av, rather than focussing solely on the destruction of the Temple).  However, I for one am pleased that I was forced to check the dates of my grandparents’ passing, write them down and look forward to hearing their names in shul at the appropriate times every year.  I have never forgotten them, but this act of vocalising their names gives them a specific place in time and space for them and for me.

Shabbat Shalom

As we approach Tishah B’Av, I can think of nothing more fitting than to point you in the direction of this post at Jew Wishes’ blog.

Shabbat Shalom to you all.

Tzohar

In B’reishit 6:16, Noach is told to build a ‘tzohar’ in the Ark, as follows:

צֹהַר תַּעֲשֶׂה לַתֵּבָה וְאֶל אַמָּה תְּכַלֶּנָּה מִלְמַעְלָה וּפֶתַח הַתֵּבָה בְּצִדָּהּ תָּשִׂים תַּחְתִּיִּם שְׁנִיִּם וּשְׁלִשִׁים תַּעֲשֶׂהָ:

What is this ‘tzohar’? 

There is much disagreement as to the exact translation - it has been translated as ’window’, ’skylight’, ‘opening’ or even just ‘roof’.  A more mystical translation describes the tzohar’ to be a kind of luminous gemstone, from which emanates the light of creation.

Many of the difficulties in translating this word lie in the fact that it is a ‘hapax legomenon’ – a word that appears only once in the Torah (the same can be said of a word that only appears once in any book or work by one author, such as Shakespeare). 

I came across this phenomenon through registering on the Open Book Project from Kolel which I wrote about yesterday.  For a great read on ‘tzohar’ and its interpretation, please do go and look at this post on the ‘Jewish Myth, Magic & Mysticism’ blog.  Practical as I am, I do really enjoy the mystic side of Judaism, as it takes me out of myself for a while and allows my mind to wander off into flights of fancy….

Education alert!

I have found what seems (to me at least) a great website – Kolel: The Adult Centre for Liberal Jewish Learning.  I haven’t taken a really detailed look around, but the part that attracted me was Project Open Book, which you can find under the ‘Learning’ tab.  It’s free to register with them and once you have done so, you can enter four different ‘Gates’ – Torah, Jewish Life, Family and Women and learn, learn learn!

Looking at The Gate of Torah, I can see the following:

An Introduction – What is Torah and why do Jews study it. A short introduction.

Survey of Jewish Texts – As the ‘People of the Book’ there a plethora of sacred texts that define Judaism. This course starts with the Torah, and explores all facets of sacred Jewish texts, including Talmud, Midrash, Siddur and Zohar.

How to Study Torah (yay!) – An introduction to the sacred text of Judaism: the Torah. Learn how the Torah was written and transmitted. This course introduces a unique methodology to help readers ask questions and how to find answers that help to uncover the Torah’s deeper meaning.

Mishnah – The first codified text of ‘oral’ Torah is the Mishnah. The unit guides the user through 11 texts of Mishnah from the volume of Brachot (chap. 5 & 6). This course was prepared by Rabbi Neal Loevinger.

A Course on Zohar – This course is an introduction to study of the Zohar from a liberal Jewish perspective prepared by Rabbi Justin Jaron Lewis. It includes a substantial introduction to Zohar study and seven translated texts with commentary, as well as recommendations for further reading.

This all looks right up my street (pardon the oh so very English colloquialism). Can’t wait to get reading!